Diante de Ti

Venho perante Ti

Confusa. Cansada. Vazia.

Enche-me pelo Teu poder.

Guia-me, mostra-me quem devo ser.

Ensina-me a confiar, protege o meu caminhar.

Desafia a lógica, subtrai a razão

Concede-me o conforto da Tua direcção.

Transforma o meu viver, faz em mim o Teu querer.

Dá-me ânimo para prosseguir, coragem para sentir.

Sabedoria para saber o que tenho que fazer.

Diante de Ti

Venço. Posso. Sou.

Smile. You won. You're gone.

Wake up again and make yourself believe all is well.

Get ready for this journey that will take you to the road you have traveled so many times before. You know where and how it ends. Why do you keep on going?

Smile at the world and give them the assurance that you know the answers for the questions that were never asked.

Keep on going, no matter how much that little voice inside your heart screams.

Don’t take shortcuts. Don’t look back. Follow your own lead, as you learned the hard way you would have to.

Don’t you dare leaving any piece of your heart behind! Don’t you feel the scars stinging?

Why are you running or, even, where to?

Yes, you know where it ends. Is this what you want?

The others, you say? Do you see them looking for you, when you are lost within yourself? Do you find them reaching out to help?

You are so lost and you don’t even stop to realize it. They made you believe you could do it, but who are they to say anything when they don’t even know who you are?

One day you will be introduced to yourself, and then you will know that you are your most intelligent opponent.

You know you can help them. But you are so empty right now, you know that, or do you?

Fight this battle that you can’t win, run this race that you are bond to lose, throw the dart and watch the wind take it away from the target. Be assured, nonetheless, that all this you can change. For the best for them, and what about you?

You will be so tired in the end you won’t even know what you have won.

And all this, the victories you can’t cherish, they all are loss.

Smile, you won, and now you’re gone.

Tell me

I really should go to bed. But, tell me, why do that when you know all you will do is toss and turn for an indefinite amount of time?
Seconds become minutes, and minutes become hours. My mind is drown in thought, my thoughts stuck in dreams.
Tell me, what is the way out? How do you make it go away? Where do you push to make it stop?
Tell me. I need to know before all that is left is a shadow of what I once was or tried to be.
Sometimes I think I get a glimpse of that light of resolution shining upon me. But it fades... so quickly... that it isn't even enough to warm the sleepless cold.
It's freezing here. The coldness lingers, as the flames glow away.

Utopia

An existential universe.

So much emptiness that I couldn’t tell why when or how it started. But at the same time… so much. So much of everything. No reason to complain; in all truth, only to be thankful.

What was I running to or from? What was this incessant race against myself? Where was it going to take me? Why did I dare myself to run? Why did I make myself persevere?

There is got to be more to life. An unappeasable idea. There was more, but there will always be. When was it going to be enough? Is contentment an unquenchable state for me?

Stereotypes that don’t let me breathe, expectations I can’t live up to. Who am I? Who will I be?

Free yourself. I dare you to run. Go and know that you can do it as that person you ought to be would be able to. Will you come back?

The other side of reality. The untouchable unattainable side. That place where words aren’t simply said, but felt, and feelings aren’t simply thought, but lived. This place, if it exists… will it ever be tangible? After all, it is only utopia.

Why do you still hope, then? Why do you keep going? You quest for idealized perfection. You know it shan’t be found; or, at least, it is reputedly chimerical.

And then, I found you.

You contradict reason, logic, and probability. You subtract fears and multiply smiles. You add wonder and divide the world in splendor.

You are sufficient reason for me to face everyday with a smile. You give reason to what I thought was lost forever. You are what books and wise men say doesn’t exist; but you are real. Are you not?

Welcome to utopia.

Pelas mesmas razoes, it is

Palavras, ideias, pensamentos, ideais - percorrem a minha mente. Um momento de descanso de tudo isto. Um minuto perdido no tempo. Uma hora em branco. Um paragrafo por escrever. Um acorde esquecido. Mas seria pedir demais.

A vida acorda-me com uma orquestra tocando uma sinfonia. Mas o compasso soa tal qual uma arritmia. Pum Pum... Pum Pum... Pummmmmm Pummmmm Pummmmmm Pummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...........

Fecho os olhos e absorvo o som da irregularidade.

O Maestro sabe muito bem qual e' a melodia certa e conhece esta musica melhor do que eu. Entao, confio, abro os olhos e contemplo a batuta movendo-se em ondas magistrais. Sei que nao consigo ainda compreender a beleza desta composicao. Um dia...

Por agora posso e consigo apenas distinguir um compasso que soa a manha de nevoeiro e que me completa. Linha melodica que me move. Uma folha pautada que se enche de notas, uma frase com pausas respeitadoras do meu ser. Sinto o oxigenio da liberdade a perscrutar-me e rendo-me -a inexplicavel vontade de sorrir.